Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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