Who did Billy Mays play for?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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