Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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