she smelled like a LAN party
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
