So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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