Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Acid is not a monday night drug
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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