look no pants
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
me + whiskey = a bad person
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