Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
