I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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