Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
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the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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