I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
My vagina is officially offended.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
i think i just lost a toe
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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