Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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