also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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