Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
