physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Randomize
