Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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