That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
