I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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