Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
