im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
