BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
