I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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