Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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