STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i just sent this text using only my big toe
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
