Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
