I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
