haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize