She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
