For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
