No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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