clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
