I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
