Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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