the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
