Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize