Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
