Whats the glycemic index on semen?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
