Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
