I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
That's when you crack a 10am beer
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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