but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Randomize
