did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
