every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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