This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
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