508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
