everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize