There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
