He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
i think we sleep fucked last night...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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