i don't like sucking hair
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize