yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
