I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize