So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
